I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
