I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
