I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
