How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
