I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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