I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Randomize
