I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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