Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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