It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
