I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Randomize
