i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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