Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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