Even the bartender felt bad for me
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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