You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I have already put on my inside pants.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
