I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
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