you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
