I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
