Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
