Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
