These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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