i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I'm just crazy horny about you
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
