Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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