Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize