The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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