office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
