I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
vagina is talking i cant
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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