I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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