I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
