I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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