What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
