At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
