i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
