I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
