nut hugger
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
