Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
