He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
did you just send me my own nude
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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