yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Randomize