i would punch a child for taco bell
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize