??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
This gyro tastes like lonliness
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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