Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Randomize
