google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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