you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
