I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
