maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize