apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I party with great urgency now.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
