I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
