Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
