The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Randomize
