i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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