His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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